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scaredy cat

by Awksymoron

supported by
Night Beach
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Night Beach So pretty! Emotional! Detailed! Harmonies! Beautiful songwriting. Favorite track: haunted.
Sidney Gish
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Sidney Gish such a pretty album! lovely bedroom pop + out of this world whistling skills :^) Favorite track: haunted.
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1.
when someone makes the choice to keep you out of their life it should be easy to move on and i wish i would stop thinking about the sound of your voice god, it's been so fucking long but i still think about the places that i would have taken you i think about the faces of all my friends meeting you and us spending time in my den or us starting over again maybe i'm insane who am i to blame it's not my fault and it's not yours but i can't take this shit anymore it's not your fault and it's not mine and i know i'm wasting my fucking time
2.
haunted 03:57
each night before i go to sleep i toss and turn, my mind runs deep all i want is to get up at a decent hour but baby you've cast a spell on me like some evil magic power why o why can't i sleep at night? why do i still think that you're somethin' special, like you're outta sight? chorus i'm haunted by you how i wish it wasn't true i'm hung up on you but you make me feel so blue i'm waiting for someone new who will care for me like you pretended to at time i know i'm doin' fine feel like i've found some peace of mind but that all disappears when i catch a glimpse of your smile and i know that i should be over this but baby it's taking a while why o why did i have any faith in you, when i was nothing but honest, and all you were was untrue? chorus now i'm aware, i'm able to see the things that make you no good for me i liked you a lot but you hurt me real bad don't get how i fucked up and it's driving me mad each night before i go to bed i think about things that i might've said and i wonder if you ever stop and think about me or recall the nights when we held each other so tight and so tenderly why o why don't i stop doing this to myself, when for all that i know and for all that i care you can go straight the fuck to hell? chorus
3.
scaredy cat 01:54
i'm really scared of messing up and i'm scared of looking bad i'm scared i'm just not good enough and i'm scared that i'm too fat i'm scared cause i know i never meant as much to him as he meant to me i'm scared of tearing down my walls because i've been hurt so badly chorus i'm scared of letting people down and i'm scared of where i've been and i'm scared of never finding love cause i can't let anyone in i'm scared that no one truly cares about things i have to say and i'm scared that i forgot to do something important today i'm scared i'm not trying hard enough to hold onto my friends and i'm scared that they'll all move right on i mean i guess it would make sense chorus i'm scared that i have hurt people i'd never wanna harm and i'm scared i won't get the chance to say sorry from my hurt and i'm scared of what the future holds and i'm scared of doing this wrong and i'm scared because i've only known sadness for so long chorus
4.
talking in the dark is nice because i don't have to look you in the eyes and see that you don't feel the way i feel about you but that's alright cause this feeling's not new spending time alone with you feels good and if you'd let me kiss your face i would but i don't understand what's going on with us and i'd rather not deal or make a fuss i know that i've been strung along and that you won't get how what you've done is wrong but for some reason i welcome you to stay i'd miss you too much if you went away
5.
i could go for hours of walking in the park yes, i could go for hours of walking in the park i could go for hours of lying in my bed and getting all caught up in thoughts inside my head i could go for hours of us swinging side by side or remembering the way i felt the day my grandma died i could go for hours of feeling so alone and thinking about the ocean, and all of earth's unknown i could go for hours of thinking about my friends and how grateful i am, they love me to no end i could go for hours of taking a nap and thinking about the hours, the ones i won't get back

about

these are songs from december 2015-june 2016. they were written in ecuador, oberlin and new york and they were all recorded/fixed up in garageband. every part is performed by me.

some artists+bands i love:

karen o
jim croce
amy bruce
mal devisa
sam cooke
the ronnettes
paul baribeau
michael fuckin jackson

credits

released June 17, 2016

album art by lya finston

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all rights reserved

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about

Awksymoron New York

a happy sad song based indie pop rock band from Brooklyn, NY

full band is Athena Matsil, DJ O'Loane, Griffin Jennings, and Phil Joy

@awksymoron
awksymoron.music@gmail.com
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